7 Rules of Life
- Make peace with your past so it won’t disturb your future.
- What other people think of you is none of your business.
- The only person in charge of your happiness is you.
- Don’t compare your life to others. Comparison is the thief of joy.
- Time heals almost everything. Give it time.
- STOP thinking so much. It’s alright not to know the answers.
- SMILE. You don’t own all the problems in the world.
If you’re like me you probably handle certain points like a boss, but struggle with others! That’s normal!
1 Make peace with your past
It took me a few years of hard work to do this because I had a lot of healing to do, a lot of learning new tools and skills to handle my emotions, my anxiety and depression.
The abuse had taught me I was worthless and not worthy of being treated respectfully. The criticism had taught me there was so much wrong with me, that I’d never measure up to anyone else or be good enough.
2 What other people think of you is none of your business
This was a tough one to overcome. The criticism I had received primed me to always be worrying about what others thought of me, because I FEARED receiving the next round of hurtful, mean criticism.
As an adult I learned that no one else has any power over me if I don’t allow it! I learned I can choose not to have critical people in my life if that’s all they offer me. Even if they offer other positive things, if the criticism is too much, I can choose to not have them in my life.
When I practiced giving myself grace to make mistakes, to be me, I was able to release the old inner tapes which had only perpetuated the pain.
3 The only person in charge of your happiness is you
OOOh! This is a hard one!
All the commercials and ads we see are targeted to make us think that our happiness lives outside of ourselves, and all we need to do is own the right things, preferably the newest version, that we need to be seen wearing certain things and be having certain experiences.
These are marketing tactics, and don’t correspond to real inner happiness!
Real inner happiness comes when we focus on who we are as a person and doing things which honor that!
One HUGE point to helping that happen? Point # 1: doing the hard inner healing to be able to really FEEL okay with being happy! Also working on point # 2 is super helpful to get rid of those old mental tapes which rob the happiness from today!
4 Don’t compare your life to others
When we’ve received a lot of criticism, comparing ourselves to others becomes second nature.
When we practice points # 2 and 3, it no longer feels necessary to compare ourselves or our lives to others, because we feel comfortable in our own skin!
5 Time heals almost everything
Yes, time does heal almost everything, but we’ll feel so much better when we actively work on the points above!
As you’ve seen from this post and others I’ve written, I believe in actively working on inner healing and happiness, and not just waiting passively for results to magically happen, because that’s not how it works for many of us!
6 STOP thinking so much
If we’ve been criticized a lot in our past, worrying becomes a habit, because we’re trying to think of every scenario in advance and figure out how to handle it so we can avoid more criticism!
This is exhausting and very stressful!
MOST of what we worry about NEVER happens!
Did you know that is been proven that when we smile, our bodies produce more endorphins and when we’re struggling, those endorphins help us get through tough moments?
Even if we’re depressed, a genuine smile (not one of those fake ones) helps to lift our spirits!
I have read that clinical depression can be reduced in severity by working through the steps above, but I’d advise having help to do this.
Working through all the steps will take more time than just reading a blog post, but if you look at different things you can do to help yourself work through each point, you’re going to be able to do it, over a span of time!
I’ve found that once I got started, I got better at putting different skills into practice the more I practiced them!
Guided Journals help you work on a particular issue by answering questions to help see patterns and to find solutions:
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