Have you been hearing a lot about learning to be grateful for whatever life gives you… even if life is throwing you a lot of curve balls lately?
Me too. I’ve also been reading a few disgruntled pieces from folks who are tired of being told they need to be grateful for what they’re going through, even if that means eating lots and lots of Ramen noodles for a long, long time (for one lady).
I heard a good thought the other day: “Saying someone can’t be sad because someone may have it worse is just like saying someone can’t be happy because someone else might have it better.”
Going through difficult things is tough, it’s hard, it takes all we have sometimes.
We’re told that if we wish good things to happen in our lives, we need to visualize what we want, think about it so strongly that our emotions imprint the Universe with what we want, and that any negative thoughts can accidentally send all the good running away. Being grateful for all we have, even if it is a life of troubles and difficulties, and very little in the way of material gains, is part of this visualization to have things magically work out for us we have been told.
What if this sounds hollow and we don’t feel grateful for all our difficulties? What if it is taking too much effort just to live? Are we doomed to life never getting better? Are the overwhelming negative feeling we experience going to be responsible for any good to leave and never come back?
No! I don’t believe that!
I’ve lived through long periods in my life when I was going through one difficulty after another, and I despaired of things ever changing. It took a lot of effort to do what I needed to do, and to keep putting one foot in front of the other to face a new day.
Then all of a sudden, it was as if the cogs in the universe shifted, and a sequence of events would happen, and all of a sudden my life had changed.
Some of the changes entailed going through more difficulties, so for a long time I despaired of things getting easier.
Yet, the Universe always took care of me and my daughter. We may not have been wealthy, but our needs were always met. I started to see this pattern, and started to notice the little things that did work out. By taking note of the little things, I was able to see that the Universe/God cared about us, because, the little things that happened, though small, were exactly what we needed in the moment.
Once I started getting the sequence of 4 identical messages from the 4 psychics, I started to realign my thoughts even though the changes were incremental at first. (I was told that I had agreed to all these troubles before coming into this life, and I was supposed to write about it in order to help others.)
If I had indeed agreed to all the troubles before coming into this life, I slowly realized I needed to change my outlook on how the Universe saw me. (I explain more of these events and what I learned in the book How to Heal Your Life on a Deep Heart Level.
Up until that time, I had deeply internalized the messages from the two churches I had attended, in that God was displeased with me and gave me the trials to correct me. I felt so without hope, because I was trying my hardest to life life in a good way, a way that I hoped would be pleasing to God, and no matter how hard I tried, I felt it would never be good enough, and the proof was how I was being “punished”.
I had reached a point of feeling I was so worthless that I shouldn’t even be walking on this earth, and planned a way to remove myself from this life. Luckily, I had an intervention, and moved forward from that point.
In changing my thoughts and being told I had agreed to all those troubles, given where my spirit was at that time, and the conditioning I had gone through for years, my first thoughts were to blame myself for everything, and make myself feel even worse.
Around the time that I was receiving the messages from the psychics, I was also hearing about the information from the movie “The Secret”, and people around me interpreted it all to mean that we attract the troubles into our lives.
I started to get depressed, and spiral down into feelings of depression, self loathing and self blame.
Somewhere in all that mess, my brain was thinking, and I realized that there was a little bit of opposition in those two messages!
The fact that the universe saw fit to send me 4 people giving me almost identical messages, told my brain that this was important, and I needed to pay attention to it, and that perhaps it wasn’t meant to drag me down, but that it was to show something very important to me, and all this was happening at a time in my life of extreme stress, of seeing my second husband’s dreams go down the drain, and that lead us to a bankruptcy. I wasn’t exactly emoting a lot of positivity, yet the Universe chose exactly that time to bring me messages.
When I started to piece together how the Universe has always been taking care of us, together with the idea that the Universe cared enough about me to give me a reason for all my trials, I started to see that there may be something bigger going on!
Slowly my brain started to process this information, and I looked into my past and saw how my worst fears never manifested, how the Universe send us small tokens on a regular basis to show we were taken care of and remembered, even dare I saw, cared for and perhaps loved, I started to feel able to feel gratitude.
I’ve come to see that we are all part of a bigger plan, and that perhaps all of our troubles and trials aren’t to punish us, but to help us. We aren’t supposed to be ground down, but in learning the lessons, in going through trials, we are to become stronger, much like going to a gym builds bigger and stronger muscles.
When we are told to feel grateful, it is very difficult to do so, almost like pushing a puppy’s nose in his mess. Stinks.
However, when we can see we are indeed an active part of the Universe, and not a forgotten entity, gratitude for how we are being taken care of, for the many small blessings that help us to carry on and to move forward, isn’t now an impossible concept.
I’ve seen my life change and move forward quite suddenly sometimes, when the time was right – either I had completed something I was supposed to finish, or someone else needed to finish their part. Either way, when I look back, the timing was better that if it had happened in the moment I wished it too.
I’m learning that there is so much going on in the Universe for each of us, that there are so many factors at play, and so many possibilities and little miracles which have yet to unfold in our lives!
I’m grateful to know that nothing is set in stone, and positive change is possible for all of us!
(See the Joy Journal below for additional help!)
Teaching ourselves to like, even to love ourselves
By changing our inner dialogue, we change EVERYTHING!
Challenge: When a negative thought enters your mind, think three positive ones. Train yourself to flip the script!
Red Ocean or Blue Ocean? How do you think?
Making a change… “How do I take that first step?”
An answer to dealing with the Inner Critic!
My top 10 most viewed posts, plus a few bonuses!
Setting “Boundaries with consequences”
A helpful trick to be able to overcome negatively Comparing Ourselves to others…
Do you only accept yourself if you look a certain way?
10 Steps to Owning Our Happiness
Please go to my Archived Posts page to find a list of posts to check out!
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My books: Developing Happiness When You Can’t Find It and How to Heal Your Life on a Deep Heart Level. are available in paperback and Kindle. Audio book coming soon!
Guided Journals help you work on a particular issue by answering questions to help see patterns and to find solutions: Removing Inner Blocks, Anger Journal, Guided Anxiety Journal Joy & Mindfulness Journal My Boundaries Journal My Inner Thoughts Journal My Travel Journal
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