by Tamara Kulish from https://tamarakulish.com/

Love is wanting others to be happy – Dalai Lama

There’s so much going on right now around the world that it can be very overwhelming and difficult to find positivity or not to feel anxious and fearful of what may come next.

Love and compassion may be in short supply when we see anger and hatred being directed at those in our communities or country.

While we may feel powerless to do anything of consequence to stop any of the madness and destruction going on, we hold a single truth within ourselves, which is our power to show love and compassion.

When we choose to follow a path of love and compassion, we need to let it percolate into our daily lives, into the small things.

Showing kindness, love and empathy can even help to avert other potential crisis.

I remember reading the story of a serial killer, and he was filled with rage and pain, but when one individual smiled sincerely at him one day, he decided that person had some redeeming value and so decided not to kill them as he has originally intended.

I’m not saying that our smiles can avert all catastrophes, nor can one act of kindness radically change the outcome of what’s going on, but our gentleness, patience, kindness and helpfulness can make a profound difference in the life of 1 person, except we don’t know ahead of time who it will be!

Meme taken from Facebook

Love is wanting others to be happy

– Dalai Lama

Living a life of kindness and love is like throwing a pebble into a pond and watching the ripples expand outwardly, which then is much more like throwing a handful of pebbles and watching the ripples interact with each other.

Sometimes we need to take a deep breath and not let a sarcastic remark loose on someone who may be just having a hard day. Sometimes we need to take a step back and realize that every difficult situation doesn’t need us to immediately jump into attack mode to “put others in their place” in order to feel safe – sometimes just stepping back does the trick too.

Living a life of kindness and love works so much better when we can also change our inner tapes in how we speak to ourselves.

Are we harshly critical and judgmental of ourselves? Do we keep calling ourselves terrible names? Do we have difficulty giving ourselves grace?

If you’ve seen yourself in the above, I urge you to start changing how you speak to yourself, for your body and spirit are listening to those words. They’re entering into your mind and underscoring the negative things that were said or done to you.

You deserve better treatment from yourself! You deserve to be cared for and liked by yourself! You are worthy of this, and have the capacity to change your self-talk around!

I believe in you!

 ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

Blessings!
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Tamara

I hope you’ll poke around my Archived Posts Main page divided up into 3 sub-pages: Mental Health and Rewiring the Brain || Healing and Developing Ourselves || Positive thoughts and Affirmations to find a wonderful trove of supportive and encouraging posts!
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16 thoughts on “Love is wanting others to be happy – Dalai Lama”

  2. An interesting thing Spirit told me was…until I can love myself, I cannot truly love another. Whatever is holding my pain and fear within, is blocking that love we give out. And like all else in this world, the moment we understand something…we let it go. We just have to understand our fears. But as you said, we have to start this journey somewhere, speak to us more gently, lovingly, and start building that bridge to our hearts is those very steps. Great post Tamara, may that ‘healing’ of us begin that journey we’ve always wanted of that love and happiness 🤗❤️🙏

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    1. So well put Mark, indeed, when we don’t know how to love ourselves it is difficult to show love in a healthy way.

      Some people are able to love others in spite of having little to no self love, but often that love is overly self-sacrificing because there’s no healthy sense of self to create boundaries. I was that way. Until I learned to like and then to love myself, I was pouring love into people that I should have walked away from. I was trying to fix in them what was broken in me by pouring out a lot of love on them, but it was like pouring water down a drain since they didn’t love themselves either to know how to receive it.

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      1. That is one of the hardest things to go through in trying to fix others. It drains you because they haven’t understood their own fears, or our own. And until we realize it is up to them and let go. But doing that is like cutting chains, simply because of that need to be loved. It is what I found in many, that upbringing of wanting to be loved by those we love and look up to as children. But their fears unintentionally are passed on to us because of those very actions in our childhood, they had not understood their own when they raised us so just pass on who they are at that time. So then we spend the rest of our lives trying to ‘get’ that love, not realizing our very actions actually push others away. We create our own fears so we are forced to face ourselves. Years of feeling we are being treated poorly and unloved, the world is a terrible place, ever holding those negatives of I’m ‘not good enough’, ‘I can’t do this or that’, makes us finally let go that ‘need’ and come inside to find our answers. And when we do face our own fears by seeing them and understanding the ‘why’ of how we feel we have been treated, we’ll let it go in that understanding. Anything we understand in this world, we let go off. We have no need to hold it any longer because of that understanding. The day we understand our fear, we let it go. Then there is no longer our fears ‘wall’ of being on guard to be hurt. It was ever between us and them, until we let it go. An experiment. Go up to a cat or dog and pat them while they are happily wagging tails and reacting to you. How do you feel. Relaxed and happy that they respond to you. Go up to a human and your on guard to whoever that person is. If they are loved as a friend, your more open. A loved one, even more open. A stranger, quite blocked. Our ‘on guard’ is a protection mechanism. But in our fears it goes into overdrive beyond what it was meant for. Simply because of the pain of not having our love met. We all do it, simply because we don’t understand why. The day I finally saw through my fear, I could see every step I had taken did just that, reached an understanding why. We need that understanding so we can see the love behind it. Every single emotion has an opposite, even love. And we cannot understand and appreciate happiness unless we have experienced sadness to…or what would we measure it by. This world is very ‘conditional’, so that we can find that ‘unconditional’. And trust me, it is there. Even after all we have faced, it is there just waiting for us to dare to step through the most painful thing in our lives. Our fears. You have indeed been on a big journey kind lady, and hard as it is, you have dared to face it 🤗❤️🙏

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        1. Yes, you have described what I experienced and went through for my healing. Indeed it’s challenging to see beyond the fear, and the only way is to walk through it, then we discover it was a wall not a mountain. Once we pass through it, our lives change, for we can let go of the burdens we have carried for too many years. We are the wayfinders, helping others in turn find their way.

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  4. It is tough right now and it feels overwhelming sometimes but you’re absolutely right, no one can take our love and empathy away from us. Regardless of what’s happening around us, it’s important to be kind and loving.

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    1. Exactly, we need to choose love and empathy, in spite of what’s going on or how people around us are behaving.

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    1. Yes, positivity, love and compassion can be just as contagious as the anger and hatred. Good thing, isn’t it/

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