“If you want the Moon do not hide from the night;
If you want a rose do not run from the thorns;
If you want love do not hide from yourself.” – Rumi

The damage to my spirit from the abuse I went through caused me to run from myself, because through the lies I had been told and through the messages I had inferred from those days I had been left with the feeling that I was a terrible person, unworthy of love.

Many of us who have experienced abuse, criticism and long-term negativity suffer from feeling unworthy, unlikable and unlovable; thinking about ourselves positively is a struggle. Being able to say “I like myself” or “I deserve good things” is difficult; it can feel fake to say that about ourselves.

We need to realize that the lies we were told no longer need to define us.

Healing is possible. We’re our best healers, for no one will take as much time as we will to work out the anguish and pain.

Remember this as you look inward: healthy people don’t hurt others; damaged people do. They hurt others in the proportion they themselves feel pain. The pain and suffering they inflicted on you was a projection of their own suffering and not an indication of your own unworthiness.

When I learned this truth I was able able to release my pain I had been nursing like a poison cocktail, for I realized that my abusers were themselves damaged. I was the convenient recipient of their own festering pains.

In order to heal from the festering pains of the past, we acknowledge the shadows, the darkness and the thorns, instead of running from them. The past is over and has no more power over us, so instead of running from those things by stuffing down the emotions with food or alcohol or drugs or other forms of escapism, we can see them through a lens of compassion for ourselves.

Compassion for ourselves may not feel natural when we’ve been accustomed to receiving criticism and abuse.

I have found that giving myself Grace and Permission to make mistakes to be freeing from the beating myself up over every little wrong-doing I felt I was doing.

Teaching ourselves to heal, to like ourselves and give ourselves grace allows us to be freed from the shadows and the thorns of our pasts.

More encouragement:

• Love is NOT all you need!
• Love is not what you say. Love is what you do.
• Setting “Boundaries with consequences”
• Is Love Enough to Help Someone Kick a Drug Habit?
• “What kind of love do I allow in my life?”
• The power of love is the strongest force in the universe.
• The more you extend kindness to yourself, the more it will become your automatic response to others.
• Loving Ourselves… means we don’t always put ourselves LAST!
• Never lower your standards just because you are lonely. It is better to be by yourself than to be with the wrong person.
• Choices, Chances, Changes. You must make a Choice to take a Chance or your life will never Change.
• How people treat you is their karma… How you react is yours…
• It is always an inside work. It starts within us
• No matter how long you’ve traveled in the wrong direction, you can always turn around

 ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

Blessings!
Thank you for sharing this post and for following me!
Tamara

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